Not So Fast

Well, my doctor warned me that there wouldn't be a straight arrow to recovery. Before the procedure, I thought the biggest challenge would be fatigue, or not feeling like myself. I would have never guessed that I would be a victim to the edema (which I should have, as it is the sole symptom of my amyloidosis).

For those who just tuned in, here's a recap. My amyloidosis left deposits in my kidneys, which disrupted their ability to filter protein from my urine. This is causing my body to retain fluid in my body, which you we all sometimes get in the heat or during a long flight. This fluid resides in my 'third space', or in the tissue underneath the skin, so it doesn't cause long-term damage.

I have had worsening edema since April. Before treatment, I was up 10 pounds. Prior to the treatment, I was given an intravenous diaretic (Lasix) to get this under control. They got me down to 5 pounds of fluid. I was stable. Five pound of fluids provide some stiffness, but you can still move around.

During my treatment, I was given fluids to assist in my recovery. As a result, I started bloating up. Because of my condition, I was told that I would bloat up like a water balloon. Okay, whatever it takes to get me back to health. I don't recall having a problem with it, but of course I was drugged up like Courtney Love, so that didn't mean anything.

I started to swell as if someone had stuck a garden hose up my rear and turned it on full blast. Okay, bad analogy. How about I started taking water like the Titanic. First my feet, then my ankles, lower legs, upper legs and then the family jewels. When it engorged my genatilia, I started to get purturbed. It's a guy thing -- when something affects a man's little Johnson, he immedately becomes very protective. As a matter of fact, I'm sure all men reading this now are cringing. I know I would.

So, back to my privates. Hey, I run a candid blog here. If you are a man with moderate to severe edema, your groin will swell up to a point where you could take pictures and send them to National Geographic. Or open an adult website and sell shots of them to pay for your procedure. Let's just say that John Holmes has nothing on me right now. No, I will not post a picture of them for you. (Well at least not for a small fee.)

I've continued to swell, and now that I've bounced back, they stopped the fluids. Nevertheless, I've put on 1 to 2 pounds a day of fluid. I am now at 17 pounds of fluid. At this point, walking is now a chore. I can no longer put on my socks by myself. Walking across the apartment takes a huge amount of energy, and when I get there, I feel as if I just finished the Tour de France.

I'm not happy, and my loving doctors are trying to help me. On Friday I got some IV Lasix, which took off 2 pounds. I gained it back the next day. This weekend, I was instructed to take 80mg of Lasix to continue the fight. It did nothing. Today, I was told to double the dose (160 milligrams!) Initally it also did nothing. But then the stomach cramps began, I felt miserable all afternoon as the high dose wracked through my body.

What this means: probably no release from the hospital this week. I will require intravenous Lasix most of the week to get this under control. Until then, I'm sitting on the couch watching the Discovery Channel. I figure I'll be a history buff by time I get outta here.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some more pictures to take for my new website.